women’s rights, independence, gender equality and . . . the man card

Way back when, our female ancestors started the fight to have rights. The right to think, the right to an education, the right to choose whom to marry, the right to choose a career, the right to be acknowledged as a breadwinner, the right to be responsible for oneself, the right. . . Okay, there are just way too many things we had/have to fight for to list them all here. What a scary, scary thought ,though, that the things I now take for granted were not “intended” for me! clouded marbles

Although I can’t imagine not being able to think for myself, making my own decisions, fending for myself – I would’ve been regarded as a very rebellious female – or gaining knowledge and get recognition for it, that is not really what this post is about. Nope! I’m wondering if the continued fight is not actually taking something away from us women and, inadvertently, from men?!

A while back I read about Steve’s proud accomplishment in holding on to his Man Card.

boxes of paperI thought about the man card-thing the next time I had to, somewhat literally, pull my weight at work – stacking boxes and boxes of paper into a storage area. In the olden days this was thought to be a man’s job, you know, doing all the heavy lifting. If a man saw me doing this a few years ago, he might have come to my aid, offering to break his back before I’d have to break mine – and the best part – I wouldn’t even have had to ask!  Yikes!  Maybe I’m romanticising this a little – I do love my historical novels 😉

Asking a man for help today. . . hmmm. I’ve tried that a couple of times, you know. I’m not too proud to acknowledge my limitations and ask for help. But when a woman is refused (or unable to get) help, she will grow stronger, she will become more independent,  self-sufficient and she will stop asking. And, when a man does offer help and a woman refuses it, the odds are that he won’t offer again – not today, not in my experience. Not that I can speak with any authority about what men think.  In fact, that’s another thing I’ve always wondered about because gender logic doesn’t mesh most of the time.

So, Ladies & Gents, are we independent women robbing men of their Man Cards or are we just balancing the scales? [updated]

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13 thoughts on “women’s rights, independence, gender equality and . . . the man card

  1. I think that some feminists who fight for rights are sometimes barking up the wrong tree. i don’t want to be like a man, I don’t want all the man stuff for myself. In the old days when women had “no rights” they did have many benefits – there were no dustbin ladies – the men did that horrible job, women and children had first rights in hostage situations and sinking ships, and women didn’t have to fight in wars. I don’t want those things to change – we had a reasonably good deal – yes sometimes there were hardships and I think I would have bumped my head a lot with regards to speaking my mind and being independent but I would have enjoyed being supported financially 🙂

    • Oh, I’m sure most women can do anything they put their minds to – I’m pretty independent and self-sufficient myself.

      Thanks for the link, Wendy, I’ll check it out.

      And I’m glad I could introduce you to Steve, he has some interesting posts 🙂

  2. As a “petite” woman, I like to think I can do anything a man can, but in my world that just isn’t logical. I am not physically able to do the things men do where I live. I can tell you right now, I’m not about to grab a powersaw and go out and cut our winter wood, because I’m not physically strong enough. But, when it’s something I know I’m capable of doing I don’t want or expect any help. While I can’t do everything a man can, I’m certainly no wimp.

    • Laura, you just planted a very scary image in my head with the “petite woman” and “power saw” reference 🙂

      I think it’s important that we be realistic about things we can and can’t do, so good for you!

  3. I think everybody (male or female) likes to be needed. If women are too independent, it can be pretty daunting for a guy to offer his help. Although I believe it’s important for women to have equal rights (in terms of voting, equal job opportunities etc), I really enjoy it if a guy offers to help when he can see I’m struggling with something. Why do I need to be superwoman to prove that I’m a capable person. Of course, Willie also has to deal with big spiders, frogs and rodents for me!

    • Nicely said, Lisa! I’m beginning to think that I’m wanting my bread buttered on both sides 😉

      I have to deal with the creepy-crawlies by myself, though I’ve learned not to shriek too loudly. 🙂

  4. Great post CM!

    For myself, I am pretty independent and I think I can look after myself pretty well. But I’m certainly not one of those bra-burning feminists. For me emancipation is about respect, rights and freedoms yes; but I do believe men and women are complimentary to each other and work best when they co-operate, not when they’re trying to tear each other down. I think a little acceptance and compromise can go a long way.

    Cheers, H.

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